Wednesday, October 14, 2009


The lack of sleep, overabundance of anxiety, and what might be some
sinus trouble has left me completely exhausted. I have two post-it
notes worth of things to do outside of work today and all I can think
about it closing my eyes for a few minutes. I'll be at work at 6am
tomorrow and then traveling until at least midnight. I'm stressed out
about traveling, but very, very, very super grateful for Rachel's mp3
player. I'll try to create safe space for myself within the headphones
so I don't worry so much about everything around me and how I relate
to it. Still don't have a way to weigh the suitcases and I'm pretty
worried that they'll be over the weight limit. Maybe someone has a
bathroom scale I can borrow? It would be much easier to feel cute and
confident if I didn't sweat so badly. It's one of the main reasons I
only wear very dark or very light colors on top ... hides it to some
extent. It's super embarrassing and makes me feel dirty, gross, and
unattractive. Feeling cuter and more confident would, in turn, make it
easier to pack for this trip. Although, given the weather predictions,
I don't have many choices.

On a fairly random side note, did you know that some people believe
that a couple's first dance at their wedding is symbolic of their sex
life? Does that mean we should dance with lots of people and switch up
the styles? anyways ...

I had more to say but I work came across my desk again and I had to
work and wake up.

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