Monday, June 29, 2009

Amazing cuteness:

In case you were wondering what would look beautiful on you and make people around you smile: 

Friday, June 26, 2009

Priorities? Wha?!?! Where?!?!!

At leas G8 made it to the top 10. It wasn't even on there a little bit

Something to think about ... Straight Privilege

I feel like that list is missing a few key items, but there are some
really well-articulated points and some that I know I would've missed.
It's worth the time to glance through the list and think about your
own privilege, be it race, sexuality, socioeconomic, etc.

Friday, June 19, 2009

"don't forget to let your life rot you inside out ...." ALK3

Feeling the clarity (or delusion) of a break (withdraw) from meds.

Friday, June 12, 2009


There's alot going on and I'm not sure I'm handling it well.

One entry started last week, but never completed:
Let's start with a few simple statements to attempt to keep me on track as I try to write this throughout the day:
1. I'm missing my androgyny. And I'm not sure why.
2. I feel like I need to fight to prove my queer identity -- to whom, I'm not sure. If i'm trying to prove it to me, what does that mean?
3. I'm nervous about moving and all that it entails.
4. Loving the increased income from Etsy, but terrified it's going to stop and also wishing I could spend some of it on new materials like Artclay or MPC3 and the appropriate firing tools.
5. Not really feeling the job security lately. Revised: know i have a few months at least.
6. Agreement.
7. Ahhhh - the return of NIN, APC, Tool, White Zombie, Rob Zombie and the like to my life. =)
8. My meds are making me sick like whoa.
9. I stopped traffic a few days ago. With my hand on the steering wheel sitting still at a red light.
11. New Orleans & Back in 24hrs. I took photos, but they're stuck on my phone. Hostel was beautiful, there's something beautiful in the decay of that city ... A - you'd like it.
12. It's become a need in my life NOT to have a roommate. I can live with my fiance, but NOT with our current roommate. And it's making me feel like I don't want to have a roommate at all anymore. Unless it's someone i know and we know and we know we can live with. ... maybe.
13. Phone situation, so everyone knows - call the house or work, not the cell. Email, fb, or IM.

Another, started yesterday:
I just don’t know how to manage my time lately to fit everything in.

These things HAVE to be done:
  • Work -- 8:45 – 5:30 technically, realistically up 7:30am – 7pm out at the latest
  • Cook – 3 days a week solo, 1 together
  • Eat – dinner takes about an hour to eat, sometimes 2 if we watch a movie with it
  • Etsy – I have custom order that have time limits, they require time right now
  • Searching – at least an hour, preferably more. I’ve been doing this at 6am because it’s easier for me to focus then, but I’m not sure it’s the best for me overall
  • Sleeping – I need at least 4 hours, preferably more
  • Down time – I need at least a few minutes to work on a project for me, or just to sit and stare, or to check google reader, or to talk with friends online
  • Together time – A big, big need for me especially with the stress that we’re both under right now. Cuddling, talking, playing, wii, movies, tv … something.

I’m not really willing to compromise on those. The Etsy stuff can be less than everyday, I think, but not always. I’m starting to get large orders that need time put into them and they all have deadlines that always approach faster than expected.

Needless to stay I get started and then ......
oh wait now it's like 8 hours later and i haven't even finished that sentence. uuuuuugggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

I need an attitude/perspective shift ...

... so here's somethings that make me happy or at least lighten my mood a bit.
Feeling really discouraged and isolated. I think this office
environment induces it.

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

From TWLOHA Blog

You can read the whole thing here:

From the TWLOHA Blog:
We'll leave it with this...
If you struggle with self-injury, you are not "a cutter". You are a person. You are not only your pain. You are not only wounds and scars. You are also better things. You are possibility and promise, hope and healing, daydreams, favorite books and favorite songs. You are the people that you love and the people who love you. You are hope and change and things worth fighting for. This is all your story and your story isn't over.

I know some of you need this too, right now.