Picture heay entry

I smiled today at someone in the hallway out of simple politeness and I realized I was really smiling and that I hadn't felt the feeling of genuinely smiling like that at someone. Yeah, I've smiled but it was different and in that context significantly different. Which, of course meant i promptly started to tear up and made a dash for the bathroom because I'm hormonal and my body's adjusting to meds which is all happening on top of the stress of a job where I feel like I'm failing constantly, ill family members, and an extra dose or two of the normal internal struggles and financial woes.

The first few days of getting back on track taking everything on time and as directed is rough. Your body has to adjust and sometimes things get worse before anything helps. Today I'm very tired, but still finding myself so fidgety that it's physically hard to sit still and mentally very difficult to concentrate on anything for too long. I woke up today with a couple itchy red bumps on my face and didn't think much of it ... assumed they were bug bites or something. But then as the day's gone on they're getting itchier and larger. My scalp is starting to itch too. My instinct is to say it's possibly caused by the medication, but I've been on it before for an extended period of time and never had this problem. It's getting pretty obnoxious. Hopefully some cortisone will help once I get home. Trying to hang on until I get home.

The fight(s) from last week are lingering somewhere within my heart. They resurface occasionally with a pang. They'll fade in time, I'm sure, but ouch. For me, they've resulted in a lot of insecurities and quite a bit of fear.

Today I really feel the need to create, but I'm very limited in that at work and I kinda have other plans tonight and I want those to be open to last as long as needed. So I thought I'd post some former artistic endeavors. More are on my flickr and my photobucket. Some repeat on facebook or myspace. Some just suck.

Sadi looking thoughtful near the lake

Glass sculpture

Geek Squad shirt mod. I wore it into work one day, that was fun



Part of the sequence you can see in the slideshow

Stenciled shirt.

Welcome to suburban Miami

Weird mopey portrait

An accidental play with focus, beautiful though scanned film

Les at the pond, scanned film


Ryan skates at dusk for a contrasty look that i kinda like (scanned film)

stylized Will

Original Design for the tat seen above

Not sure this animated gif is going to work, but i hope so...


I'm hanging up my wings, the halo has been gone for years:

Stormy approach

up or down?

Ben stamped

Bro merch shot


I have plenty more, but I want to leave it at that for now. Work work work.

Hectic Morning *edited in the afternoon*

As hectic as the first day back to work after a long weekend is, I have been stealing a few seconds intermittently to check up on blogs and follow seemingly obscure links to new readings. I thought I'd clear my brain out for a bit and share some. I like to share what I read. I think the interaction and sharing capabilities of the internet make it such an amazing medium for me. Somewhere along the way a teacher (I'm thinking it was 10th grade english and I'm almost almost certain it was Graffam) talked about talking "to" someone versus talking "with" someone. Not that that's either here or there, but it's sort of a base philosophy of mine. Sometimes it's good to remind yourself that not everyone around you operates with the exact same set of basic assumptions, premises, ideals, etc. (Although, some would argue that the world makes that very obvious, I think it makes it easier to be tolerant, get along, and interact with people if you actually "know" that and don't just hear it.) Okay so before it gets anymore obscure for this morning (or before it's no longer morning [geeze!]) here's what I've been reading this morning:

We were talking about this Sunday night and into the early hours of monday morning and maybe it's just those darn hormones but wow this amazing blog seriously stirs up some maternal instincts. Beautiful writing and absolutely stunning photographs!

Aprons! Okay so this really is for Erin and Oz, but everyone can appreciate the subtle sexiness of aprons. Thanks angry chicken!


SWAPS!!! Many of you know that my newest addiction is swapping. There's a good variety of them out there. Who doesn't love snail mail? I'm mailing out my movie swap this afternoon. I hope to finish up my "My Favorite Things" swap package tonight and get it in the mail in the next two days. (hope you're excited Anne!!) Finished my matchbooks for a matchbox swap
via Swap-bot. (This one looks exciting ... if you can see it without an acct) Slowly trudging through my 100 positive affirmations swap, but there's time. Also doing an xmas cookie swap.

Wow, some serious ADD (or mania, ya know could be either) just kicked in at the same time that like 15 bazillion things needed to get done and I'm going to have to revisit this post later because i just made a to-do-list that included lists that I needed to make.

Well, looks like this is going to have to be a three-edit post. So much for blogging at work *sigh*. Ahem. anyways.
More links before i try to work:
Lightbulb Greenhouse
Indecision
Recycling Contest
Tara Books
badbuttons.com

Some favs from Etsy:
Kelliedrawspictures
littlepurls
carmencita878
hippyofdoomshoes

okay okay work now and later: swap-bot, etsy convos, headache meds (hopefully), cupcake photos, craftroom organization, photoshoot invite, organization, simplicity, and publicity, to name a few. As well as calling for a haircut, the bank, and mom back.


3rd edit:
Hue Test ( I didn't do so hot)

I really don't feel well. Made it home, but not to any sort of relaxation or releif. The animals are even being okay for a puppy and a cat, but I can't settle my thoughts and I can't seem to calm down. I feel sort of sick too, but stress can do that, of course. Didn't return any calls, but i'm really not in a patient, extroverted mood. Really want to get in the back room and organize and get to work on projects, but I'm procrastinating. I'm watching this show about this amazing family. I miss my family but I completely dread the stress of even calling mom back. Ugh.

I got an amazing matchbox in the mail!!!!!!